She's A Wild One
by kitty-kat12
Summary: Punished by a demon mage for a insult, Harmony is turned into a child. Angel & the team are left to serve and protect W&H's newest five year old vampire diva.
1. Choice Of Words

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Just borrowing characters. 

A/N: This is a response to gidgetgirl's _Harmony Throwback Challenge. _Fred turning into Illria never happened. Generally, it consists of humour but might possibly become darker in later chapters.

Enjoy.

* * *

__

_"Krivsiir blak sotkure. Sirla niptak." _Harmony cheerily said to the demon mage, their most recent important client. The creature glowered at the impeccably groomed blonde vampire and let out an ear piercing screech. Its minions howled in response.

Angel, Fred, Wesley & Gunn flinched.

"You loathsome, despicable sub-demon!" Their irate guest hissed as it continued to glare at Harmony, who was now looking uncomfortable. He had very little respect for vampires, creatures that his clan considered as unworthy to be part of the demon world, and this one _dared_ to insult and threaten his family?

She let out a nervous chuckle. "What did I do? I only said, _good morning. I hope you like it here_."

Wesley sighed heavily. "Harmony, you just told him that his wives are whores and you wish to eat his children and wear their entrails as trophy."

"Oops!"

"You, _vermin_, shall be punished by death!" The mage hissed as it took long strides to Harmony, who was now backing away.

"I didn't mean to offend you, oh power demon mage. I swear." She looked at the others for some sort of assistance.

"She lies." One minion uttered gravely. "Their kind lies."

The mage clasped its hand around Harmony's neck. "You _must_ be punished."

"Perhaps, we can come up with another form of punishment for Harmony." Angel quickly suggested as he walked over to where the mage stood, who was now pressing Harmony against the wall. The mage sneered in response to Angel.

"Death is the only solution." Another minion spoke.

Gunn looking calmer than the rest of the group rose, smoothed his hands over his pinstriped suit and stood beside the mage and Angel. "If you really wish to punish this _thing_," He shot Harmony a feigned disgusted look which she met with an offended one. "Sending her to a quick death would not suffice."

"Hey, you're not helping!" Harmony squeaked, trying to wriggle away.

"_Silence_, creature!" The third minion hissed.

"The human speaks wisely. Death is too easy an escape." The mage replied as he loosened his grip around Harmony's neck and shoved her away. "_Shranta shranta vlek. Quor milz trek_. _Qour. Qour. Qour_." He began to chant, his voice hoarse and loud. His minions joined in.

The mage turned its gleaming eyes to Harmony once again, who was rubbing her neck and looking mighty pissed. "In three weeks time, _you_ shall know what it's like to be eaten and have _your _entrails worn as trophy like the children of my tribe who have gone before us."

With that said, their enraged visitor and his three underlings stormed out of the office, shoving Spike out of the way who was just on his way in.

"What the hell?" Spike muttered, rubbing his sore shoulder. "I guess it didn't go well, huh?"

Angel shot him a warning glare.

"Thanks for the help, guys." Harmony declared indignantly. "Mr. Stinky-Breath practically broke my neck. And you just stood there!" She flashed an angry look at Gunn.

"Girl, I helped you. Be thankful." Gunn retorted.

Harmony huffed. "What did he do any-"

Before she could finish, there was a loud _poof, _followed by smoke and Harmony yelping lightly.

"Oh, dear." Wesley murmured as they all stared in awe at five year old version of the vampire-turned-secretary.

"Harmony?" Fred called out softly, as if not wanting to scare the little girl.

The blonde upturned her dark eyes to the much taller woman and readjusted the now oversized clothes she was wearing. "That's _Princess_ Harmony Kendall and who's asking?" She coolly replied, lisping slightly, as she placed her hands over her hips.

"I don't think she knows who we are." Spike drawled casually not at all frazzled that his ex-girlfriend was now a child.

"Apparently not." Wesley piped in.

Harmony cleared her throat loudly. "It's rude to talk about someone when in they're still in the room, you know?" She drawled, accusingly eyeing all of them. Before anyone could utter another word, Lorne walked into the room and Harmony let out a high pitched scream.

* * *

A/N: This is my first throwback and _Angel _fic so be kind. Althoguh the original idea for this belongs to gidgetgirl, I will be adding some other stuff to it. What the demon mage really did to Harmony will be explained in the next chapter.

I appreciate constructive criticism.

Please review.


	2. Her Royal Highness

A/N: Thanks so much for the reviews guys, especially to gidgetgirl for that very nice encouragement. Here's the next chapter.

Enjoy. 

* * *

Harmony continued to scream, alarming the adult A.I. members. Angel looked compelled to calm her down but being oblivious in the ways of children and anything remotely related to them, he did the only thing the could do. He backed away as inconspicuously as possible.

Lorne let out a nervous chuckle. "I know I look scary, kiddo, but I won't bite. I don't eat children. Honest to Elvis. So, how about not busting out our eardrums, sugarplum?"

Much to everyone's relief, the tiny blonde immediately silenced and the group wondered if she did this because she finally ran out of air. Harmony blinked. "Silly man, I'm not afraid of you." She declared, as if the idea of being frightened was completely absurd.

Lorne grinned. "Well, that's good to hear then."

"But you're green." She continued, flashing him a fierce look. The host looked down at himself as if realizing for the first time that he was indeed, _green_. "And you're wearing _all_ red. Do you _know_ that you look like a Christmas tree?" Harmony's dark eyes widened as she managed to look repulsed.

Fred giggled, amused that the new amnesiac five year old Harmony was not at all petrified of the demon standing a few feet before her but more of the fact that the said demon had broken a major fashion no-no.

"She has a point, dude." Gunn uttered with a shrug.

"Thank you, big, tall hunky man." Harmony quipped with a brilliant smile.

Gunn grinned widely, flattered. "She thinks I'm a big, tall hunky man. Did you hear that? She said-"

Spike rolled his eyes. "We heard." He dryly uttered. "Must be nice to be complimented for the first time in your life."

Gunn glowered in response.

"Alright, people." Angel declared commandingly. "Can we worry about who's hunky and who looks like a Christmas tree _later_?" Murmurs of agreement erupted into the room.

"My suits are at the dry-cleaners." Lorne defensively explained in an attempt to save himself.

"You look fine, Lorne." Fred sweetly reassured her.

"In the meantime, we need to figure out how to get Harmony to her old self." Wesley declared somberly.

Harmony, who everyone seemed to have suddenly forgotten that she was still standing there, piped up. "What's wrong with me now?" She demanded.

All eyes were on Angel just as an uncomfortable silence filled the room. "Fine." He mumbled grudgingly. "Harmony, there's nothing wrong with you. You're perfectly fine." He assured her.

Pleased with his reply, Harmony flashed Angel her best smile yet. "I thought so. I am _perfect_ and I am _fine_." She drawled cheerfully, invoking yet another amused giggle from Fred.

"Right."

"I'm going to find her something more suitable to wear." Fred offered as everyone began to clear the room.

"Spike, watch her while we work." Angel ordered.

The leather clad vampire almost staggered as he looked from Angel to Harmony and back to Angel again. "No!" He defiantly declared, a frown falling on his face. "_No way._"

"She's your ex-girlfriend." Angel hissed.

"So? She's _your_ secretary."

"_You_ relate to her more than any of us and _we _have work to do." Angel quickly retorted.

The blonde scoffed. "Standing around and commanding people to do this and that is _not_ work, you wanker. _I _could do that."

"Right. So, it won't be difficult for _you _to _stand_ here and _command_ herto stay put until we turn her back." Angel replied, a triumphant look on his face. Defeated, Spike let out a sharp exhale. "Don't let her out the room. The demons and monsters roaming around might scare her, even if Lorne doesn't."

"You're going to pay for this, Angelus."

"How does seven dollars an hour sound to you?"

* * *

Dressed in a baby blue t-shirt, jeans and shoes that Fred managed to have someone run out and buy, Harmony sat in front of Spike, her little legs aimlessly swinging on the sides of the coffee table she was currently sitting on.

Spike shot her a look, wondering why Harmony was staring at him. He cleared his throat and shifted in his seat. "So, how about that weather?" He said flatly.

"So, how about that weather?" Harmony mimicked, her voice sounding just as unenthusiastic as Spike's and almost as British.

"Don't even _try_ copying me." Spike warned.

She looked at him, not at all intimidated. "Don't even _try_ copying me."

"Harmony!"

"_Princess_ Harmony!" She corrected, without missing a beat.

"_Princess Harmony_, stop it!" He hissed.

"What?" Harmony blinked innocently. "You're the _copycat_-_ter_. You _copier_." She boldly accused him.

"I am _not_!" Spike protested huffily.

Harmony folded her arms in front of her stubbornly. "Are to."

"Alright, this is childish."

The little girl let out an exasperated sigh and slumped her shoulders as if _Spike_ was the one who was grating _her_ nerves. Harmony hopped off the table and roamed the large room, touching and inspecting everything and anything she could get her hands on.

Spike warily watched her, hoping that she does not break anything. _Better yet, she should break something_. _Something expensive_, Spike deviously thought. _Serves peaches right for leaving me to baby-sit. I'm the big bad. This is degrading. _"What the hell is taking so long?" He mumbled to himself, glancing at the doorway.

"Hey, Spike?"

"Yeah." He suspiciously replied. She sounded _too_ sweet and nice. She was up to something.

"I bet you five bucks and all the cookies in the world that you can't catch me."

_Was that a challenge?_

Before Spike could even open his mouth to form some sort of retort, Harmony swiftly crossed the room, yanked the door open and bolted.

"Oh, bring it on."

* * *

"He cursed Harmony?" Angel incredulously asked.

Wesley, Gunn and Fred nodded. Lorne had run off somewhere, probably to buy himself a new suit that was nowhere near the shade of red and no longer be criticized by the pint sized fashion police.

"He cursed her into a _child_?" He continued.

"Yes, Angel." Wesley replied as he flipped through the pages that illustrated Drevluk demons and their various clans. "And as far as we know, she has no knowledge of who we are. I suppose it's safe to assume that her memory goes only as far as the first five years of her life."

"It's better than having her neck snapped like a twig." Gunn uttered.

Fred nodded in agreement. "Actually," The Texan stated, giving her colleagues a meaningful look. "He cursed Harmony into a child who will be eaten three weeks from now. She's still in danger."

"Can we undo it?" Angel asked, frowning.

"Did you see that?" Wesley asked; his eyes turned to the open doorway. He could have sworn he saw Spike being chased by a giggling Harmony. _Was Spike, the second most brooder in the building, actually smiling while being chased by the five year old? _

"See what, Wes?" Fred asked.

The British man shook his head. "Nothing."

"As I was saying, can we undo it?" Angel repeated his previous question.

"I haven't found anything that shows how to reverse the mage's spell curse. I'm sure we'll find something that will help soon." Wesley answered optimistically.

"I'll see what my sources can find." Gunn declared.

"Same here." Fred piped up.

Wesley and Angel nodded in unison. "This might take awhile, Angel. What do you propose we do with little Harmony in the meantime?"

The vampire paused for a moment, pensive. "We'll take turns watching her for now. Let's hope this we undo the curse, fast." He said and walked out of the room.

* * *

"Hiya!" Harmony hollered as she catapulted on Spike's chest, tackling him to the ground. "Take that, Blondie Bear. Take that! I win! I win!" She victoriously declared, after giving him a series of sharp jabs on the chest. Harmony leapt off of Spike and did her version of a victory dance, her small hips swinging and her blonde hair bouncing wildly on her shoulders.

Spike looked sullen, trying to hide his amusement. "Cheater." He mumbled. "You _poked_ me in the _eye_."

She let out a laugh and then carried on with her victory dance around Spike. "Princess Harmony wins over Blondie Bear. _ I_ am the new _WWF_ champion! Can you hear the crowd cheering, Spike? Can you?"

_Glory hog, _Spike thought with a small smirk.

"Ahem." Harmony halted her victory dance and stared at Angel who was standing by the doorway, a disturbed look on his face. Angel wasn't quite sure if he was bothered the fact that Spike _managed_ to amuse and entertain the little girl or that Spike was actually having a good time too. "I take it the two of you are getting along." He stated.

Harmony beamed and eagerly nodded.

Clearing his throat, Spike rose from where he was currently laying and straightened his clothes. "We did okay." He uttered apathetically, trying to conceal the fact that he and little Harmony had a blast running around the building playing _tag_, which evolved into _hide and seek _and ended with a version _WWF _in one of Wolfram and Hart's empty lounge areas. The said lounge area was currently in shambles right now, all thanks to the two blondes.

No matter how much he groused, mumbled curses under his breath and looked as miserable as humanly possible when the Wolfram and Hart employees saw him following or being followed around by Harmony, Spike had to admit, _only to himself though_, that he did have fun.

Just a little.

Spike was _not_ going to let the world, demon or otherwise, know that he was a pretty good babysitter. The devastation it could do to his reputation was _unthinkable_.

"Is Blondie Bear is trouble?" Harmony asked, clasping Spike's hand. Angel almost guffawed. _Blondie bear? _Way to shrink a man's ego by giving him an adorable, unmanlynickname.

Spike looked down at her and frowned. "That's Mr. Spike, Harmony. _Mr. Spike._" Harmony had previously declared while playing WWF, like it was common knowledge, that he should be called _Blondie Bear _because Spike was blonde and soft like a bear. It _only_ made sense.

Spike had painstakingly tried to brainwash the nickname out of little Harmony in hopes that when she turns back, the adult Harmony would cease to call him by that disturbingly endearing nickname. His efforts were sadly futile.

Ignoring her new found friend's protest, Harmony turned innocent, pleading eyes to the morose looking vampire in front of them. "Is he?"

"No." Angel replied in a clipped tone, steeling his resolve from the cuteness that this child-version of Harmony seemed to radiate.

"Good." Harmony gladly answered, stepping forward and taking Angel's large hands with her free one. "Now, you can play dress up with us. Peach would look nice on you. Peach for peaches."

Angel did _not_ look thrilled.

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A/N: This message is for _Abisnocom. _I'm not surprised that there is a similar story to this one and I'm not surprised that the author wrote it before me. This plotbunny was originally thought up by _gidgetgirl_ and posted as a _challenge,_ which means that it is open for the taking to as many people as possible. I might be wrong here but I'm getting the impression that you're implying that I copied the author that you mentioned. I'm not.

_And _I will continue this.

Thanks to the rest who reviewed.


	3. Lessons Learned

A/N: As far as I know, Angel lives in an apartment within the W&H building and everyone else lives somewhere. I'm not sure where exactly. 

Also, I don't know much about Harmony's childhood. Let's just pretend that what I write about it is remotely close to what it is.

Enjoy.

* * *

"Is she okay?" Gunn warily asked Angel as they both glanced at Harmony's way. The little blonde was hopping around Angel's office, humming to herself as she curiously eyed the various weapons perched on the wall.

"I think she's high on sugar." Angel declared. He and Spike had earlier bribed her with candy in order to avert playing dress-up with Harmony. Angel never thought she would eat half the jar they got her. Now many hours later, she seemed to still be bouncing off the walls with more energy than she already possessed.

And she didn't look like she was about to stop anytime soon.

"You think?" Gunn drawled. "You only figured this _now_? After she broke one of the last two Mesopotamian vases attempting to do a cartwheel in Wesley's office, sang _old McDonald _over and over for five minutes, stole the mail guy's cart and ran away with it, set the garbage can on fire-"

Angel raised his hand in defeat. "I get the point, Gunn. Spike and I shouldn't have fed her so much candy." Fred was fortunate enough to be in the lab while Harmony was systematically driving everyone crazy.

"Ooh, pretty." Finding something that caught her interest, Harmony quietly looked around the room. Angel and Gunn were talking, their backs turned to her once again. It was safe.

Smiling with glee, she tiptoed and outstretched her hands to reach the object.

"Harmony, don't touch that!" Angel warned, just before she could get her hands on the sacrificial knife. It was probably the rubies on the handle that attracted Harmony but Angel was not going to let her play with it, no matter how pretty she thought it was.

Startled, Harmony backed away quickly, knowing that she was in big trouble. "I didn't do it!" She declared in all innocence, hands hidden behind her back as if to show that they were _nowhere_ _near_ the objects.

Angel did not look convinced. "These are not toys, Harm." He said, sounding rather understanding but firm. "These are weapons. You don't play with them."

"Can I touch it? Just a little?" She asked, meeting Angel's gaze. It was so pretty. They all were and Harmony wanted to play with each and every one of them.

He shook his head. "No." Angel declared with finality.

"Please?" She pleaded, batting her lashes.

Angel shook his head again. "No, Harmony."

Harmony shot him an aggrieved look. "Meanie!" She hissed with all the vehemence her little self could muster and then sauntered out of the room to sulk.

Angel sighed. He was only trying to protect her.

"I'll go get her." Gunn offered and followed their new budding drama queen. "Where are you going, Harmony?"

She huffed. "Where's Spikey? He was fun. You're all no fun!" Harmony stopped walking, folded her arms in front of her defiantly and glowered at Gunn's expensive shoes.

"Spike is somewhere." Gunn wasn't sure. "Don't be mad at Angel. That thing you were going to touch was sharp and you could have cut your hand off if he didn't stop you." He said as he crouched down to her level.

Her dark eyes danced with excitement and a small smile crossed her face. "And there would have been lots of blood, right? All red and sticky, right?" She asked, disconcertingly delighted with the thought of blood.

"There _would_ be lots of blood." He concurred. "But it wouldn't be fun because you would be in pain."

"Oh." Harmony looked disappointed. "Am I in trouble? _Big_ trouble?" She blinked a few times; worry flickering in her innocent eyes.

Gunn smiled. "Not at all. Just don't try playing with weapons anymore." He replied, knowing full well that Angel didn't have the heart to be really angry at an adorable little girl like her. "Besides, you got me in your corner, kiddo."

She looked relieved. "You're the best-est Mr. Gunn Sir." Harmony declared, flinging herself to him and hugging him tightly. "Right next to Spikey."

Gunn gingerly hugged her back. _Big, tall, hunky man and now best-est. I can do no wrong. _"Just _Gunn, _kiddo. You never called me mister when you were older. No need to start now." He said and when Harmony didn't seem to understand, Gunn just stood up and patted her head.

"Is this the circus?" She asked as she walked over to the railing, pressed her face against it and watched the assortment of both humans and demons mingling and interacting with each other. All day, Harmony had been exposed to nothing but the employees and clients of Wolfram and Hart.

Angel had long surrendered trying to keep Harmony from seeing anything that might frighten her.

Gunn chuckled as he stood beside her. "I guess you could call it that." He replied.

"So, I ran away with the circus?" She asked, trying to find some sort of explanation as to why she was suddenly here and no one she knew was with her.

Gunn offered her a wry smile. "Just for a little while, kid. Hey, how about you and I go find something fun to do." He suggested brightly. "You were right when you said it's boring here."

"I said you're _all_ boring." Harmony quickly corrected him, remembering the words she used earlier. Gunn just laughed as he took her tiny hand and held it, leading her down the stairs.

* * *

Gunn watched as Harmony sprinted towards the playground, giggling animatedly at the sight of other children. _The kid must be sick of seeing adults and demons all day. _He thought wryly as he took a spot on the bench, next to a woman with a baby.

"Taking a day off with your kid?" She asked, noticing the expensive attire Gunn wore. The woman didn't know which one was Gunn's kid exactly.

He shook his head, smiling. "No, just watching my niece for a few hours." He lied smoothly, not wanting to complicate the conversation by telling the woman that he was babysitting his boss' secretary turned five year old kid.

The woman smiled. "Which one's yours?"

"She's the loud one by the monkey bars." The woman looked surprised when she spotted Harmony, who was currently swinging through the bars with startling ease and agility. "Adopted." Gunn added.

"She's very pretty. What's her name?"

Gunn smiled. "Harmony. Where's _your_ kid?"

"That little boy over there. Cody, what did I say about eating dirt? Spit that out _right_ _now_!" She sharply exclaimed, shifted the baby in her arms and walked over to her son who was currently trying to swallow a mouthful of sand. Gunn grimaced and watched the woman go off. He returned her gaze to the monkey bars and saw that Harmony was gone.

He scanned the surrounding areas. Nothing. "Harmony!" Gunn called, hoping that she would show herself. There were at least twenty five children crowding the large playground. "Harmony!" Worry began to sink in as Gunn tried to spot her in the throng of children. _I only took my eyes off for a few seconds. _Gunn inwardly declared as he peered inside the small tunnels.

Suddenly there was a loud shriek followed by someone crying. Gunn ran to where the commotion was.

"She's bit me!" A boy a year or two older than Harmony wailed loudly, holding his injured arm as his mother rushed over to him. The woman glared at Harmony who looked like she had been doused with a handful of sand.

"That's because you called me a monster." She retorted, her young voice filled with anger and hurt. "You're not nice!"

"What's going on here?" Gunn's voice boomed loudly as he rushed over to Harmony, feeling suddenly very protective of her. He picked her up.

Her bottom lip trembled but she refused to cry. "Gunn, he was mean to me." She whispered, balling her hands into small fists.

"You should teach your daughter not to bite other children." The young boy's mother declared angrily as her son continued to cry.

Gunn scowled, holding Harmony tighter. "And you should teach _your_ son to have some manners, and not pick on little girls." He retorted, glaring at her just as dangerously. He didn't bother to correct her.

"She bit my son! He could get rabies from her!"

Harmony huffed. "I don't have rabies, you wanker!" She growled, remembering Spike's words to Angel earlier. It seemed appropriate to use it now. Harmony wasn't quite sure what rabies were but they sounded awfully like cooties and she felt like defending herself from the evil woman and her even more evil son.

The mother gasped.

"I want that little girl to apologize."

Harmony scowled insolently. "No!"

"Ma'am," Gunn said firmly, raising his hand. A circle of curious bystanders had formed around them. "Perhaps you should have your son checked. This is my name and number. You can send your hospital bills to that address and I will gladly pay for them." The woman was momentarily appeased as she accepted Gunn's business card and walked away with her son. "Let's go, Harmony." Gunn whispered, walking back to where his car was parked.

"I don't like the park anymore." She told him, her dark eyes brimming with tears. "I hate boys even more."

Gunn laughed, somewhat relieved by the declaration. "How about you tell me what happened, Harm." He said as they entered his car. She scooted into the front seat and Gunn buckled her up.

Harmony pouted. "I was playing with the other children and that boy threw sand at us and said girls were stupid. He got sand in our eyes and then I got mad."

"And then?" Harmony looked at him hesitantly. "You have to tell Gunn, Harm."

"I felt funny inside and I bit his arm. It was tasty." She smiled, still tasting the boy's blood in her lips. It felt awfully good to hurt him back.

"Why did he call you a monster, baby girl?"

"Because my face was all bumpy and he said I looked like a monster. I'm not a monster, am I, Gunn?" She looked worried as hurt flickered in her eyes.

He offered her a smile. "No, Harm. You're not a monster and girls are not stupid. That boy was just being nasty." He reassured her.

"Am I in trouble again? For biting?" She knew Angel would not be happy to hear that she made a boy cry.

Gunn smiled at her. "No, you're not in trouble again." He reassured her. "How about we get some dinner? All you've had was candy all day. You must be starved."

* * *

"She turned all vampire-y?" Fred softly asked. Gunn nodded quietly.

"She had her _game face_ on." Spike rectified as he and the group glanced at Harmony who was napping on Angel's sofa. She had fallen asleep in Gunn's car on the way back to Wolfram and Hart.

Wesley looked pensive and Angel worried. "We assumed Harmony had been turned into a human child when she was cursed." He drawled.

"Well, she _is_ human. The sun had no effect on her." Gunn affirmed.

"The mage's curse must have done something wonky to her." Spike declared, pursing his lips. "So Harm really bit the little ponce hard?"

Gunn nodded. "She definitely showed him who's boss."

"Poor thing." Lorne murmured with a sigh. "The little beanpole must have been scared out of her wits. Being called a monsteris going to cost her years of therapy." The group shot Lorne looks. "Oh, you know what I mean, you grumpy pants."

"So what is she, Wes? Vampire or human?" Angel asked.

"She's an anomaly." Wesley replied with a heavy sigh.

Spike scoffed. "Well, that's a refreshing name." He sarcastically declared. "Call the bit a freak already, why don't you?"

"Harmony is neither vampire nor human." Wesley clarified, pointedly looking at Spike. "When the mage cursed her, it allowed Harmony to be both. She lives, breathes like any other human child-"

"But her _demon_ is still there." Angel whispered gloomily. "How do we fix it?"

Wesley shook his head. "We can't fix. If we undo the curse, then I suppose it would be fixed."

"And why _should_ we even try fixing it, peaches?" Spike interjected irritably. "She has the best of both worlds, something that every bloody vampire out there wants. It's like having the power of the Gem of Amara in her blood."

"Even it if was possible," Wesley interrupted them before Spike and Angel got into a heated verbal sparring. "There is no need. She has three weeks left as a child and then she's back to her old self."

"Or eaten." Fred pointed out.

"Or eaten." Wesley concurred.

"We won't let that happen." Angel firmly vowed.

Lorne frowned. "Hold up, kiddies. I wasn't there when all the _cursing _began but are you sure the mage meant she has three weeks _left_?"

"Yes, why?" Gunn replied.

"What if he meant Princess Harm over there has a three week _window_ to get eaten?" He pointed out, smiling at the sleeping child. She was curled on the sofa, a blanket over her shoulders, half her face covered by her blonde hair.

Wesley pursed his lips. "It's possible."

"It only means we have to work faster to undo the spell and keep a closer eye on her." Angel stated. Everyone nodded in agreement. "Alright, we'll work again in the morning."

"What about Harmony? She can't sleep here."

The group looked around at each other. "I'd take her in but I have a bachelor pad." Gunn said.

"I have serious demon bar hopping to do tonight." Lorne declared.

"I'm going out to patrol." Spike declared.

Angel arched an eyebrow and looked at him questioningly. "Patrol?"

"Well, someone's got to do your job now that you've turned all corporate." Spike retorted with a snide smirk. "Forgotten about the little people in the mean streets of L.A., have we now, peaches?"

"Harmony can bunk with me." Fred offered quietly.

"Right then. That's settled."

"Wait!" Angel protested. "What if she wakes up in the middle of the night and decides to eat you?"

Fred laughed. "She's just a little girl, Angel."

"We have to be cautious, Fred." Angel insisted.

"He's right." Wesley agreed.

"I'll take her." Angel declared as he walked over to Harmony, lifted her in to his arms. The group looked skeptical. "I'll take her." He repeated with finality and the group dispersed.

* * *

A/N: _Dawnfighter-_there will be a tea party but it might not be with Angel. _ReganX-_thanks for the ideas. Harmony will be giving out more fashion advices. I wrote the fire in this chapter but not with Wesley's nice rare books. Not to worry. Harmoyn will get to him soon. _Seatbealts_-I didn't know that the _WWF_, by name, doesn't exist anymore. I don't watch it at all but remember, Harmony's memory is a little outdated. So, I suppose it doesn't really matter. Lorne will have his chance to watch Harm.

Thanks to _Brigurl, Cordyfan _and _Jewel _for your reviews. A cute moment with Harm and Angel is soon to follow.

I also have a throwback with Dru and Darla. It's still in the works but if anyone's interested in reading it, let me and I'll post it.

Please review!


	4. Main Attraction

A/N: Just wanted to remind you guys that although Harmony is a vampire/human anomaly, in her mind she's still a little girl. She isn't really aware of what she is. 

Here's the next chappy.

Enjoy.

* * *

Harmony woke up in the middle of the night, startled by the darkness and her strange surroundings. She sat up, her eyes quickly adjusting in the dim room.

Where was she?

Faint light seeped through the window behind her, creating shadows around the bed and in the corners. Fears of monsters and boogie men plagued her as she tried to find signs of someone in the room. She could hear everything and nothing at the same time, frightening her even more.

Why was it so dark and quiet?

Where did everybody go?

Whimpering, Harmony brought her knees to her chest, hugging the yellow stuffed bunny Angel had tucked in with her when he put her to bed.

"Gunn?" Harmony whispered; her tiny voice filled with fear and uncertainty.

No answer.

Where did Gunn go? He was the last person she saw. "Gunn?" She called out again, louder this time. Maybe Gunn would find her again. He was big and strong and he had saved her from the mean boy at the park and his mommy. "Gunn?"

Still, there was no answer.

Her bottom lip trembling, Harmony sank back down on the bed, pulled the covers over her head and squeezed her new stuffed bunny as tight as possible.

Maybe, if she didn't move, didn't make a sound, the monsters would not come for her and eat her. Harmony heard something move in the room and her tiny body stiffened. She heard heavy footsteps coming closer and closer to the bed.

Unable to contain her fright, Harmony screamed. A hand touched her shoulder and she jerked away, screaming even louder.

"Don't eat me! Don't eat me!" She pleaded, dissolving into tears.

Angel shook her slightly, before gingerly pulling Harmony into his safe embrace. "It's only me, Harm. Angel. No one's going to eat you." He reassured her, looking around to check anyway. _Maybe some part of Harmony knows about the curse. _He thought.

"The monsters." She whispered, panting, her tiny body trembling. "They're waiting in the dark."

The vampire nodded understandingly as he rubbed her back soothingly. "There's nothing there. Don't cry. Now, go back to sleep."

"Don't leave, Angel." She pleaded, grabbing his hand quickly. "They'll eat me if you leave. They will."

Sighing, Angel relented easily. "I'll stay here and keep watch. Go to bed now, Harm." He said as he sat next to her on the bed.

Mollified, she smiled, tucked her bunny under her arm and scooted as close as possible to Angel for protection. "Tell me a story." She demanded.

Angel shot her an uncertain look. "But you're supposed to sleep." He told her.

"Please? Please, Angel? I really, really like stories."

"Fine, and then you're sleeping." Angel conceded. He really couldn't argue with her, especially when she was looking teary eyed and waif-like. He paused for a moment, wondering what to tell her. "Once upon a time, there was a king and queen." Angel began.

"And a princess?"

Angel blinked, smiling. "No."

"But why? There _has_ to be a princess." Harmony insisted firmly as she yawned. "With a sword."

"I thought _I_ was telling the story." Angel declared. Harmony gave him what seemed to be becoming her trademark pouty face. "Alright, there was a princess too and she had a sword. They lived in a castle-"

She smiled, pleased. "You have to start over now."

"But-" Sighing, he gave up. Who thought story telling could be headache inducing? "Alright, once upon a time there was a king and queen and a princess."

"Princess named Harmony!" She squealed; delightedly clapping her hands. Angel just smiled and went on.

* * *

"Hey sweet cheeks." Lorne lightheartedly greeted as he sashayed towards Angel and little Harmony in a manner only he was capable of. "How do I look, pumpkin?" He asked Harmony, proudly showing off the grey suit he sported. "It's brand-spanking-new."

The five year old blonde nodded approvingly. "You look pretty, Lorne."

Lorne grinned. "That's what I like to hear, princess. Keep it up and maybe I'll let you have a drink at Caritas on your sixteenth."

Angel rolled his eyes but smiled anyway. "She's way past that in case you forgot."

Lorne dismissively waved Angel's comment off.

"Spike!" Harmony squealed as she let go of Angel's hand and threw herself on the blonde vampire who swiftly caught her just in time.

"Hey, pet. Has peaches been taking good care of you?"

Harmony nodded. "He saved me and Little Princess the Second from the shadow monsters. He's my hero."

Angel beamed. "I'm a hero."

"Of course you are, Angelcakes. You're one humongous hunk of hero sandwich." Lorne reminded him, swatting his arm.

Spike nodded and cheekily scoffed at Angel. "Who's Little Princess the Second, pet?" He curiously asked.

"The bunny I gave her."

"Want to play wrestling, Spike?" She eagerly asked. "Little Princess can be my sidekick. You and Angel can be partners. It could be a _Smackdown_!"

Spike smiled. "Another time, Harm. Angel's out of shape. He'll make me lose." The aforementioned vampire scoffed huffily.

"Hey guys." Fred greeted as she joined the group. "Hi, Harm."

"Hi."

"How about we hang out today? You and I can do anything you like." She suggested; her trademark happy smile on her lips.

Harmony looked excited. "Anything?" She echoed with a mischievous look in her eyes.

Lorne arched an eyebrow. "You sure that's a good idea, Fredikins?" He asked. Harmony may only be five, somewhat small for her age and remarkably adorable but he knew the damage she could create.

She had nearly given a pyrophobic employee a heart attack by the fire she set on his garbage can and their poor shy mail room guy was never going to recover from yesterday's incident as well. He was quite attached to the cart that Harmony _somehow_ managed to steal from him, used as a race car for a few hours before sending it to an inevitable death-Harmony style. She had crashed the cart to a wall, on purpose, despite her claims of innocence.

"Of course. Right, Harm?" Fred confidently said. "I'll have someone take over for me for the day."

Harmony nodded. "Bye Peaches, Blondie Bear, Lorney Tunes." She waved as she took hold of Fred's hand and let the other woman lead her away. "Wanker! Ponce! Sodding hell!" She added loudly. A few hours with Spike yesterday had given Harmony a whole new vocabulary.

"She's a quick learner." Spike chuckled. Angel glared at him and walked away.

* * *

"I think we should go shopping." Harmony brightly suggested as the elevator doors opened and she and Fred stepped into the laboratory. "I don't have a lot of clothes or shoes or toys. Why don't I have a lot of stuff, Fred? Are we poor?"

Fred smiled at the little girl. "No, we're not poor. You're clothes just don't fit you anymore." She explained. "Let me just get my stuff from my office and we can go shopping."

"Wow." Harmony whispered in absolute wonder as her eyes scanned the busy laboratory. She was eyeing everything with interest. "It's like magic!" She whispered, looking back up at Fred.

The Texan smiled proudly. "Well, it's science but I guess there's a bit of magic involved." She quipped. "Come on Harmony, my office is up there."

Harmony distractedly followed. She wanted to play with the magic stuff too.

"Excuse me, Fred?" One of the scientists uttered. "Do you have a minute?"

Fred's gaze went to Harmony who was standing by the doorway. "Alright but we're kind of in a hurry." She said. "What do you need?"

Harmony listened as Fred and the other woman proceeded to speak in science-tongue, a language that still made no sense to Harmony. Realizing that Fred was momentarily distracted, Harmony took the opportunity to silently go down into the laboratory. Eager and excited, she touched and picked up as many things as possible.

Spotting what looked somewhat like a large silver gun, Harmony quickly perched herself on a stool and climbed onto the table where it laid. "Cool." She whispered, looking around to see if anyone else in the room had spotted her. She lifted the weapon, inspecting it closer; her fingers touching the shiny material.

It wasn't a sword or a knife like the ones she saw in Angel's office but it was just as pretty.

Thrilled with her discovery, Harmony aimed it. "Bang! Bang!" She played, giggling to herself. "Gotcha!"

"You! Put that _down_!" Someone yelled.

Startled, Harmony turned and accidentally pulled the trigger, shooting the guy who had yelled at her. There was an loud anguished cry followed by the thud of a fallen body. Not quite sure if what she had done was bad or not, Harmony climbed off the table and stood over her newest victim to inspect the damage.

He was groaning, yellow slime oozing out of his wound. "You're leaking. Are you dead?" Harmony asked, looking down at the man, quite worried for him despite her calm appearance. She wrinkled her nose when the slime slid close to her shoes. "Eeww. Are you dead?" She repeated, kicking him to the side.

The man winced. "Ow!"

"Harmony!" Fred frantically exclaimed as she rushed over to the little girl, taking the weapon from her hand. "What happened?"

"She blew a hole through my right side. Fred, I think I see _the light_. It's bright."

"It's the fluorescent lights on the ceiling, dude." Someone blurted out invoking giggles from the onlookers.

Fred grimaced. "Oh, Lord. Oh, dear." She mumbled, quite panicked.

"He's not dead." Harmony quipped, smiling. "I knew that. Cool."

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Jones. I'm sure Harmony didn't mean it." Fred apologetically declared as she helped the man up. "You're going to heal back fine, right?"

He groaned, touching his already healing side. "I knew my Heklar demon heritage would give me an advantage in case of emergencies but I still don't like being _shot_ for fun. You ruined my shirt." He said, glaring at Harmony.

"But you're not dead." She reasoned inoffensively. "We can play war a lot. And I can shoot you." The man sputtered in indignation before storming away, mumbling to himself. "Did I do something bad?"

Fred sighed, smiling at her sympathetically. "Well, you kind of hurt him, Harm."

"But he didn't die."

"No, he didn't but you still hurt Jones. No more playing with weapons, okay?" She said; her smile still there. "Someone could get seriously hurt next time."

Harmony was silent. _Was that a request not to play weapons or an order?_ She wondered. Fred didn't have an angry face on and she was smiling. She was being awfully nice for someone scolding Harmony. The tiny little blonde decided she liked Fred. "Okay. I'm sorry but it was still fun."

"Good girl. Now, come on. We need to go shopping."

* * *

"Fred?" Harmony mumbled as she licked her rainbow colored ice cream, smearing it all over her lips.

"Yeah, sweetie?" Fred asked as she scooped her ice cream daintily.

Harmony licked again, making large droplets on the table. "Do you have a bumpy face too?" She curiously asked, making a loud slurping sound with her ice cream. The people who passed them by smiled at Harmony.

Fred instinctively touched her face. "_Oh_. No, I don't."

Astounded, Harmony stopped licking her melting ice cream. "Why?"

"Well," Fred drawled hesitantly. She wasn't quite sure if it was right to tell the five year old she was a vampire/human anomaly. "Sweetie, it's because…because-"

"Because what?"

"Well, I have no _bumpy face_ because I'm not like you."

Harmony didn't like the sound of that. "What am I?" She asked.

Fred sighed. "You're a pretty little Princess. You're special."

Appeased, Harmony smiled. "It's a princess thing?"

"That's right. It's a princess thing."

Harmony pursed her lips. "Is Wesley a prince, Fred? He has two last names."

Fred blushed at the mention of Wesley. "No, but he's British. It's close enough." She replied.

"He's a pretty British man, Fred, don't you think?"

"Yes, Wesley is very pretty." Fred beamed, snapping herself out of her Wesley filled reverie. "Now let's go shop some more before you bathe yourself in that ice cream."

A few hours later, after buying numerous of clothes, a princess costume and toys and an enormous plastic axe that Harmony would not leave without, the girls were finishing up in the bathing suit section of one department store.

"I want to wear it." Harmony boldly announced just as the cashier was putting it and the two piece suit that she talked Fred into getting for herself.

The saleswoman smiled. "Harm, you can't wear a bathing suit in the mall." Fred declared. "You can wear it the minute you get home."

Harmony folded her arms insolently and jutted her bottom lip out. "But I want to." She whined, her voice rising. "I want to! Now!"

She could recognize the signs on an oncoming tantrum and Fred was not prepared to handle one. "Harmony." Fred said, giving the little girl a warning look.

"Please, Fred. Please!" She begged as large tears welled up in her dark eyes.

Fred sighed, glancing at the saleswoman who was looking at her disapprovingly, like she was depriving the adorable little girl of a great necessity. "Fine."

A few minutes later, Fred was struggling with the shopping bags while holding onto Harmony's hand. The little girl was proudly donned in her brand-new lime green bathing suit with frills around the waist. She was getting plenty of attention from the other shoppers; a lot of smiles and _awws _and _how cutes _from the women while others were looking at Fred like she was one crazy mom.

Unlike Harmony, she did not like attention; especially one that generated people into making strange enamored noises.

"Hi-hi!" Harmony cheerily waved at her spectators. "Hi! I'm a mermaid!"

_We're almost to the exit. _Fred thought with relief when she spotted the doors. Hastening her walk, all Fred could think of was getting out of the mall. But Harmony had other plans. Spotting the enormous fountain to their right, she let go of Fred's hand and ran towards it, her blonde hair flying as she made her way through the crowd.

"Harmony no!" Fred exclaimed stridently, startling a few people, just as Harmony climbed into the fountain and began splashing fervently; giggling animatedly. Sighing sharply, Fred ran towards her. "Harmony, get out now."

The blonde proceeded to ignore her. "I'm a mermaid princess, Fred."

"Harmony, please get out." Fred coaxed softly. "You're going to get sick."

"But you said we could do anything."

Fred frowned sternly. "Not this kind of anything. Now, come to me and we are going home."

Harmony flashed Fred her best smile and shook her head. And then she proceeded to sing at the top of her lungs. "The seaweed is always greener in somebody else's lake." She bellowed, shaking her head and doing a little dance. "Under the sea. Under the sea! Darling it's better, down here it's wetter!" People were either giving Harmony strange looks or shaking their head at Fred.

"Yes, _wet_." Fred mumbled irritably just as Harmony stomped her feet, drenching Fred and a few other people. "_Harmony_!"

* * *

"Fredickins, how was-"

"_Fine_." Fred quickly replied as she set the bags down. Harmony was already dashing to Angel's office, still in her lime green bathing suit.

"You look a little frizzy there, beanpole." Lorne commented, eyeing Fred's hair. "How bad was it?"

Slumping her shoulders, Fred smiled wryly. "Harmony gave me and a few other people a bath at the mall while shouting the lyrics to the _Little_ _Mermaid_."

"She peed on you?" Lorne grimaced as he wrapped one supporting arm around Fred's shoulders.

Fred laughed a little. "No, she used the fountain as a swimming pool."

"Oh. Must have been a sight to see." Lorne quipped. "Well, at least you weren't shot and then kicked on the side. Yeah, I heard. Jones threatened to quit. It was the _talk_ of Wolfram and Hart while you guys frolicked in the mall."

"She's quite a tornado, Lorne."

The Host nodded. "That's an understatement."

* * *

A/N: Pyrophobia is another word forfear of fire or arsonophobia. Next, Wesley takes his turn watching Harmony.

Please review!


	5. Pretty

A/N: Thanks for the reviews. 

* * *

"The Queen does _not_ say that." Wesley firmly objected, raising his chin haughtily. "Her Royal Majesty is a respectable, noble woman with great manners." He shot a look at his _contender _who Wesley thought was _seriously_ misinformed about his native country and its monarchy.

Harmony gave him a hard, stubborn look, her small tiara crookedly perched on top of her head. "She does too, Wesley." She argued.

"No," Wesley pressed as he readjusted the crown on his head and touched the _lavender _feather boa around his neck. "The Queen certainly does not say, _'more bloody tea, sir wanker poof?'_"

Harmony had convinced Wesley into having a tea party with her and by the grace of England; they were going to do it right if he was to succumb to such a girlish and humiliating game.

"How would you know?"

"Because I met her." He said, pressing one plastic jewelry-adorned hand on his chest. "From _afar_ but still, I met her and she does not say such things, Harmony. The Queen would say, '_more tea, sir?'_ and she would raise her cup like so-" Wesley demonstrated the proper way to have a tea party but before the plastic cup with its pretend tea reached his lips, he abruptly halted and frowned. "Oh, dear. I'm taking this too seriously. I must have a fever."

He suddenly felt foolish.

"Are you sick? The doctor is going to poke a needle in your eye if you're sick, Wes." Harmony commented with dark look on her face. She wrinkled her nose and walked over to Wesley, the trail of her dress dragging behind her. "You don't feel sick." She said, touching his forehead.

"No, I guess I'm not sick." He mumbled, smiling at the little girl who looked genuinely concerned for him. "And doctors don't poke needles in your eyes if you're ill, Harm. They're there to make you feel better." Wesley clarified as Harmony walked back to her seat. "And they even give you candy."

Harmony beamed. "I like candy."

"Me too." Wesley replied.

"More tea, Little Princess the Second?" Harmony asked, turning her attention to her stuffed bunny. As if the toy replied, Harmony smiled and poured more pretend tea into Little Princess' cup. "You know what's missing, Wes?"

"What, Harm?"

Harmony cocked her head to the side and flashed Wesley a smile. "Weapons." She innocently declared. "We need weapons in case the shadow monsters come to attack our tea party. We're _doomed_!" Harmony let out one dramatic sigh.

Wesley nodded, looking amused. "You have your ax, Harmony." He motioned to the plastic toy sitting in the fourth chair around the ridiculously small table.

"Oh, but it's not shiny and _you_ need a weapon, Wes. For protection."

"Didn't Angel and Gunn give you a talk about playing with weapons, yesterday?" He reminded her.

"Maybe." She whispered. "But you need a weapon."

Playing along, Wesley nodded. "I'll be fine in case the shadow monsters attack. I know karate."

Harmony looked confused. "Is karate like a superhero?" She asked. "Will he save us?"

"No." He sighed, too exasperated to explain it all to her. "What I meant was I'll fight when the shadow monsters come."

"Okay, I'll protect you then." She affirmed optimistically, indicating her doubt in Wesley's ability to defend himself. Wesley sputtered but made no comment. "Now we're done with the tea party."

Relieved that the tea party was over, Wesley rose to stretch his legs. Sitting cross-legged on the floor for a long time was painful. "I'm going to do research now." He said, walking towards his desk. "You can go on with your game."

"But we're not done." Harmony declared. "It's time to play dress up."

Wesley laughed softly. "Aren't we already dressed up?" He asked as he removed the feather boa and crown.

Harmony shook her head. "That's how princesses dress, Wes. There's a _dress_ _code_." She said matter-of-factly. "Now it's time for the real dress up."

Wesley shook his head. "I don't think so. I don't do dress ups, Harmony. Lorne would probably enjoy playing dress up." He suggested.

"But it's fun, Wes. Please? Peaches and Blondie Bear wouldn't play dress up with me because it _threatens their masculinity._"

"Where did you hear _that_ from?" He asked, chuckling softly. He could certainly see how Spike and Angel would be threatened by dressing up.

Harmony smiled. "From Gunn." She replied. "So will you, Wes? Will you play dress up? I promise it's fun. Really, _really _fun. I can be Barbie and you can be…you can be someone pretty."

Wesley looked aghast. "I'm not pretty?"

"You're pretty, Wes." Harmony reassured him.

"Girly pretty or guy pretty?" He asked. "Never mind. Don't answer that." Wesley shifted his weight and cleared his throat. "As I was saying, I don't do dress up."

"But-"

"No." He said inflexibly. "And you don't have dress up clothes that fit me, Harmony. When you have clothes that fit me, maybe I'll play dress up with you." Wesley reasoned, feeling quite proud of himself for the quick thinking. He was sure he was going to get out of this one.

Nodding, little Harmony made a mental note to find grown up sized dress up clothes. "Okay, we'll just play _make-up time_ then."

"Make-up time?" Wesley echoed.

Harmony bobbed her head as she crossed the room and picked up what seemed like a fairly large pink lunchbox. Fred had bought it for her yesterday and Harmony had been beyond thrilled. "I have stuff." She said, climbing onto the chair in front of Wesley's desk and sitting herself onto of his nice mahogany desk. Harmony gave Wesley a determined look. She was _not_ going to budge until they play make-up time.

Realizing that it would probably less painful if he gave in without a fight, Wesley sighed and sat on his chair in front Harmony.

Pleased, Harmony smiled victoriously and opened her make up kit. ""First, we have to fix your hair." She pulled out a brush and a few colorful hair ties.

Wesley twitched and touched his hair self-consciously. "What's wrong with my hair?"

"Stop being silly, Wesley. I'm the expert. I know what I'm doing." Harmony said in utter seriousness as she began to briskly brush Wesley's hair in several directions. A few minutes later, after some serious hair pulling, cries of pain from Wesley, Harmony announced that she was done with his hair. "Now the make up."

Harmony pulled out a few things and Wesley began to look uncomfortable, not that he wasn't already. "Which color do you like, Wes? For your eyes."

Wesley was quiet for a moment as he looked at the various assortments of eye shadows as if seriously thinking what color would go best with his skin tone and bring out his eyes.

Realizing that Wesley was having trouble, Harmony dabbed her brush on the color that she thought suited her new best friend best. She continued for a few minutes, dabbing, applying and retouching.

"My skin itches." Wesley mumbled with a sneeze. The powder was doing damage to his nostrils. "Excuse me."

"You're so _pretty_, Wesley." Harmony gushed as she applied lipstick, the last and final touch to her masterpiece. "Fred thinks you're already pretty but now she's going to think that you're so, _so _beautiful. Like me beautiful."

Wesley looked surprised. "Fred thinks I'm pretty?"

"Uh-huh. She got _googly_ eyes yesterday." Harmony replied as she reached for her mirror. "Want to see what you look like?"

Wesley nodded, preparing himself for what he was about to see.

"Bloody hell, my eyes!" Spike's voice boomed into the room. Harmony and Wesley turned to see Spike and the rest of the gang standing by the doorway, half shocked and amused.

Wesley cleared his throat, trying to salvage what dignity and pride he had left under the circumstances. He lifted the mirror to his face and gasped. Painted in a rather nice shade of purple, a lot of blush and lipstick with his hair in several short ponytails sticking all over his head, Wesley could not have been any more afraid of his own reflection.

"Hi, guys! Isn't Wesley beautiful?" Harmony beamed proudly. Perhaps, out of everyone Wesley was now her favorite although he was a bit uppity about tea and the Queen.

A giggle escaped from Fred's lips. "Good job, Harm."

"Watcher, is there something you'd like to tell us?" Spike arched an eyebrow, holding back his mocking laughter.

Wesley huffed. "At least I am man enough to not feel threatened by make up." He declared defensively. "And my eyes look nice." He said as he helped Harmony off the table. She hugged his legs happily.

"Who wants to be next?" She asked and murmurs of excuses erupted quickly as the gang dissipated with the exception of Angel. "Come sit, Angel. You're next."

Angel shook his head. "Another time, Harmony." He replied. "I was going to ask you if you found anything new about Harmony's-"

Suspicious that her name was brought up, Harmony narrowed her eyes. "Is this a secret?" She asked out loud. "Tell me. Tell me the secret." She pleaded excitedly.

Angel and Wesley cleared their throats. "It's not a secret." Wesley told her as he scratched his neck. That make up was making his skin itch. "And no, Angel, I didn't find anything else."

"Find what?" Harmony asked without missing a beat.

"Nothing." Wesley replied. "Now, go play with Little Princess, Harmony."

"But I want to know the secret."

Wesley flashed her a warning look. "Harmony, we already played tea and make up time. Angel and I need to speak business stuff. Now go play by yourself."

She shot him a petulant look and then walked away. "Fine." She mumbled under her breath. "I'll tell Little Princess a secret and _you're_ not allowed to know."

"She listened to you." Angel uttered, surprised that Harmony didn't give much of a fight.

"Well, I humored her by playing these silly little games with her. She has to listen to me if she wants me to play again." Wesley declared. "I'm going to wash my face."

Angel nodded. "You should, you're looking ridiculous."

Wesley nodded and headed to the bathroom, leaving Angel with Harmony who was swinging her plastic ax around. "Take that and that! Hiya!" She hollered as she leapt off her feet and took a large swing. "Want to play battle, Angel?" She asked.

"Maybe another time."

Harmony stopped and pursed her lips in displeasure. "You always say that, Peaches." She declared, sounding awfully like Spike. "Bloody poof." Seeing that he was still not going to play with her, Harmony dropped her ax, took a seat and pouted in silence.

At first Angel thought she was either going to have a tantrum or cry but Harmony was still silent and strangely enough, not running around the room. "What are you doing?" He asked her, uneasy with the silence.

Harmony huffed and crossed her arms, still pouting. "I'm brooding." She declared sullenly.

"Why?"

She shrugged. "I wanted to see if it was fun." She declared. "Wes said you brood a lot. And you don't play any games. Maybe brooding was more fun than playing but it's not."

"It's not supposed to be fun." He dryly told her.

"Oh, did you know that Wes said he'll play dress up with me if he'll fit in the clothes? Want to play with us?"

Angel calculated the chances Harmony was going to find large dress up clothes and decided that they were pretty slim. And she was likely to forget about it. "Okay."

Harmony clapped her hands together. "Pinky-swear?" She said, extending her small pinky out.

"Pinky swear."

"Alright, where were we?" Wesley asked as he stepped back into the office.

Angel grimaced. "What happened to your face, Wes?"

"What? I washed it all off." He said.

Harmony eyes widened at the sight of Wesley's face. "Wesley, you have chicken pops!" She shrieked.

* * *

A/N: I know it's supposed to be _chicken pox_ but I realizedthat most five year olds can't really pronounce it that well. The dress-up will certainly happen no matter how much everyone thinks they've outstamrted Harm by pointing out that the clothes don't fit. and Angel will have his nails polished.

Gidgetgirl, the parental figure is still not established but I'm liking the idea of Gunn. Brigurl, Harmony will get his hands on Wesley's books soon. __

Thanks to everyone who reviewed.

Feedback please!


	6. Surprises

A/N: Thanks a bunch for all the reviews. This chapter is way longer than the usual. 

Enjoy.

* * *

Harmony folded the thin brown paper as neatly as she could and slipped it inside the white envelope. "To Wesley." She whispered as she made squiggles that was supposed to be his name. She placed one sparkling butterfly sticker to seal the envelope because Harmony did not like licking it even when the adhesive tasted better than she thought. "I'm all done!"

Gunn looked up from his paperwork and smiled. "Done what, baby girl?" He asked curiously.

Harmony skipped towards him, blonde hair flying around her face. "I made Wes a get-well letter because I gave him make up allergies." She solemnly declared.

Harmony had been devastated that they would not let her go with Wes to the lab yesterday, in case it really was chicken pox. And they also reminded her that Fred's lab was off limits because of what happened with Jones. Harmony had been hoping to see some eye-poking despite what Wes said about doctors being nice and she also wanted to see the magic stuff again.

"That's very nice, Harm. I'm sure Wesley will appreciate it." Gunn said.

She smiled optimistically. "I even used _special_ paper, Gunn. And stickers. Can we take it to him?"

"I have a lot of work, Harm. We can have someone else bring it to him."

Harmony shook her head stubbornly, a set expression on her face. "_I_ want to take it. It might get lost and Wesley will never get it. He'll be sad. Please?" Before Gunn could answer, Angel knocked and stepped inside the room. "Hi, Angel!"

The vampire smiled at Harmony, wondering if she remembered that he promised to play dress up with her. "Hey, Harmony. Gunn, I'm on my way to Wesley's. He said you have some paperwork for him. This not having a secretary phase is _not_ fun. We need to get-" He tilted his head towards Harmony's direction. "Back to her _older_ version. I'm missing important appointments here."

Gunn nodded. "Right. You never know you need your secretary until she's turned into a five year old." He uttered and Angel just shrugged. "Here are the papers that Wes needed. Oh, Harmony wants to deliver something to Wesley. Can you take her with you? You're on your way there anyway."

"I have a special delivery for Wes, Angel." She announced. "It's _super_ special."

Angel looked hesitant. It was only an elevator ride away. What bad could happen in that small time span? "Alright." He relented.

Harmony looked pleased and she grabbed her purse, which was a present from Gunn since she was sulking yesterday, and slung the thick straps over her shoulders. Tucking the envelope inside for safe keeping, she walked over to Angel and held his hand.

"Play nice, Harm." Gunn warned her softly.

"Bye, Gunn. I'll miss you." Harmony whispered as she ran back to him and hugged him tightly like they were _never_ going to see each other again. Angel shot Gunn a questioning look.

"She's a hugger." The other man replied. "And a little dramatic."

* * *

Angel tried to concentrate at what Wesley was saying but the other man's appearance was proving to be an immense distraction. "In conclusion, if you eat a monkey and sacrifice fifteen of your employees to Satan, demon or human, he'll be happy to decrease sale on the soul-selling black-market by fifteen percent."

"Satanic monkey? What?" Angel asked, looking thoroughly confused.

Wesley pressed his lips together and gave his boss a displeased look. "I thought so. Will you pay _attention_?" He snapped. "And no, Angel, looking at me at a different angle will not make me look less _swollen_."

"Sorry." He mumbled. "Wes, you look horrible."

"Angel, your words are so tender and affectionate that you have me weak in the knees." Wesley drawled sarcastically, miffed. "And yes, I am _very_ aware of how revolting I look and will look for the next few days." They had discovered that he was allergic to an ingredient in Harmony's make up and the effects were not pretty.

"You're still pretty, Wes." Harmony chimed. "Red and puffy but still pretty."

Angel snickered.

Wesley gave her a small smile as he tried not to scratch his face. He caught his reflection in the nearby mirror and cringed. Aside from the chicken pox looking blisters, his face was red as well, eyes swollen to a point that he looked like a swarm of bees had attacked his whole head. His lips were inflated, set in a pucker, looking like a Botox injection gone wrong.

"Thanks, Harmony." He replied morosely.

Harmony hopped off the chair Angel told her to sit on while he and Wesley talked. "Guess what? I have a surprise for you. To make you feel better, Wes." She announced happily as she dug into her purse.

Wesley gave Angel a questioning look and he shrugged. "Really?" He asked. "You have more ointment for me? And maybe some morphine?"

"We don't have dolphins here and they live in the water. And you don't have a water bed. Silly, Wesley." Harmony bobbed her head. "You have to close your eyes or else it won't be a surprise." She said seriously and waited for Wesley to shut his eyes. When Wesley did what she asked, Harmony pulled the now crinkled envelope from her purse. "One, two, three! You can open them now."

Harmony was standing in front of Wesley, smiling excitedly; her arms outstretched as she held out a white envelope to him. "Mail?" He asked as he took the envelope from Harmony.

She shook her head eagerly. "Nuh-uh. It's a _special_ mail from me. Open it, Wes. Open it."

Wesley nodded and opened his surprise. Folded at least five times, filled with heart, butterfly and teddy bear sparkly stickers mixed with Harmony's earnest doodling and what looked to be a pair of brightly dressed stick figures, was Wesley's precious and only existing Mar'turan'i scroll-his holy grail.

Angel watched as Wesley twitched one swollen eye and made a small saddened noise as he stopped himself from screaming _no_ at the top of his lungs. "I love it." He gasped with great effort. "It's…it's…"

"It's a get-well soon letter, silly. I made it just for you, Wes. With your special paper. I'll make more-"

"No!" He quickly protested. "One is enough Harmony. I shall take good care of this one." _And see if I can somehow restore it. _Wesley thought with dismay as he tried not to show his disappointment to Harmony. She did have the best intentions in mind and obviously, she put a lot of effort into his surprise. "Thank you."

Harmony beamed. "I knew you'd like it. It's better than chicken soup, you know." She declared. "In the bottom I put my name on it. Harmony. H-a-r-m-" She trailed off and frowned slightly. "I have to start over now. H-a-r-m-o-n-y. That's my name. I'm a good speller, huh, Wes?"

Wesley patted her head. "You sure are, Harmony. I'm proud of you."

"I practiced. Gunn helped me. Only a little though." She keenly added.

"Come on, Harmony." Angel beckoned. "I think we need to leave Wesley alone now." When Harmony looked like she was about to protest and declare that she wanted to stay with Wes a little longer, Angel gave her a firm look. "We have to go or else Wesley will never get better. And it's lunchtime already."

She grudgingly took his hand. "Bye, Wes." Harmony waved as Angel led her out and into the elevator. "Let's sing a song. Do you know a good song, Angel?"

"How about we sing something by Barry Manilow?" He suggested.

Harmony gave him a blank look and the scrunched her tiny nose.

"Oh, I know!" She said happily and then proceeded to sing. "_A,_ I'm adorable; _B, _I'm so beautiful; _C_, I'm a cutie full of charms." She sang enthusiastically, spinning around Angel and doing her little dance. He smiled, amused and not the least surprised that Harmony revised _A-You're Adorable _and made it all about _her_. "_D, _I'm a darling and _E, _I'm exciting."

"That's very good, Harm. Very good."

"I know." She smiled, continuing to do her little dance around him. "I'm good today, huh?" Harmony asked him.

"Yes, you are." Angel told her. There were no fires set, not carts stolen or anything broken, no one shot or fountains used as pools. It was a perfectly _perfect _day and as if someone was mocking Angel, the elevator suddenly stopped.

Harmony stopped singing and turned worried eyes to Angel. "What happened?" She whispered, standing close to him. Angel did not answer her and pressed a series of buttons.

"This is Angel, can someone hear me?" He asked sternly, speaking into the intercom.

"Hi, Mr. Angel. This is Ronald speaking." An all too cheery voice replied from the other end.

Angel frowned. "Ronald who? Never mind. Why have the elevators stopped?"

"There seems to be technical problem, sir. All the elevators have been grounded. Everyone's looking into it right now." Ronald replied.

"Looking into it?" Angel echoed irritably. "It should have been fixed _before_ I called. I'm stuck with Harmony in the elevator. Get us out here!" He glanced back at the little girl who had currently retreated in the corner, a frightened expression on her face as she clung to her purse.

"Will do, sir." Ronald replied just as brightly.

Little Harmony let out a shaky breath. "We're stuck. We struck. The elevator ate us!" She exclaimed, panicked.

Angel went towards Harmony. "Elevators don't eat people and we are _not_ stuck. They'll get us out real soon, okay, Harm?"

Over half an hour later, with the elevator lights flickering above them and the intercom no longer working, Angel had decided that he was going to take Satan up on that offer fifteen of his incompetent employees, beginning with chipper _Mr. Ronald_.

The elevator had only moved an inch since it stopped and then got stuck again. It was becoming sweltering hot already and Angel and Harmony had collapsed on the floor by then. The little girl had kicked her shoes off and her socks as well, her blonde her sticking to her face. She had cried a good torturous five minutes and Angel, wanting to calm her down and end his agony, suggested that they sing more songs.

And so Harmony's cries reduced into sniffles and together they sang most of _Mother Goose's_ songs and Angel even paid homage to some Irish song he surprisingly remembered from his childhood. Harmony had given him a strange look and called him funny.

"Why don't you play with what you have in your purse, Harm?" Angel suggested with a heavy sigh as he gave the elevator doors another look. His throat was hoarse from singing.

Harmony gasped. "We didn't try open sesame, Angel!" She declared; eyes large and hopeful. Standing by the doors, Harmony balled her fists and whispered, "Open sesame, you wanker." Harmony looked back at Angel, disappointed.

"It's not a magical cave, Harmony." He told her. _What is taking those people so long?_

Harmony nodded sullenly as she sat back down, crossed her legs and rummaged through her purse. "Angel, I don't think I like elevators anymore." She told him.

"Neither do I." He agreed dryly. "I think I'll try getting someone to orb me places next time." Angel frowned.

Harmony looked at him curiously. "Are you brooding?" Absently, Angel nodded. "Can I paint your nails while you brood? I like fun, Angel, and did you know that painting nails is more fun than brooding? And _dusky rose_ is a really nice color." Harmony said breathlessly as she held on to the nail polish bottle that she found in her purse.

Angel shook his head. "Nail polishes are for girls, Harmony."

"Spike wears nail polish." She challenged.

Angel scoffed. "I don't want to be like Spike."

The little blonde gave him a long, questioning look. "Are you sure?" Harmony asked, giving him a small pleading smile. "Spike is cool. Don't you want to be cool?"

_I'm being pressured by a five year old. _Angel mused. "Not really." He said as casually as possible.

"Please?" Angel shook his head firmly. "Please? Please? You never play with me." Harmony whispered dejectedly as her bottom lip quivered and large tears rolled down her cheeks. She gave Angel one long affronted look before putting her head down and letting out a small hiccup-sounding sob.

Her small shoulders shook as she scooted away from him, still looking down and Angel felt truly awful. "Don't cry." He told her, trying to appease her. "I'll let you paint my nails. Just don't cry." Angel told her. He was such a sucker for tears and wounded looks. And he really couldn't endure another round of Harmony's crying.

Harmony lifted her head up. "I don't think I want to paint your nails anymore." She told him as she sniffled.

"Alright then."

"Okay, I changed my mind." She said just as quickly. Angel smiled as he held out his right hand. Harmony sighed contentedly as began to coat Angel's nails with _dusky rose_, smearing them on the sides slightly.

Harmony was finishing up with the left pinky when elevator began to shake, followed by a loud rumbling noise.

Angel looked up. "What the-?"

Startled and her vampire senses picking up something unfamiliar, Harmony dropped the nail polish bottle, its contents spilling all over the floor.

She leapt into Angel's arms for protection just as something phased through the wall behind her and reached for Harmony. Angel tried to shield her but not in time and it scratched a good portion of her back and left arm. Harmony let out a frightened scream as the blood began to smear all over the back of her shirt and down her arms to her fingertips.

Angel set her down and tried to fight off the demon. It disappeared as quickly as it came. Panting, although he wasn't breathless, Angel kept his guard up in case the creature returned. He knelt down towards Harmony who was curled on the floor, her back still soaked with her blood, her blonde hair matted with the dark liquid around the tips.

She was whimpering and wailing in hysteria, her tearstained face buried in her small hands.

Angel gingerly lifted her up and she winced from the pain, letting out another frightened cry. "It's only me." He whispered as he pulled her into his arms. Harmony had vamped during the attack, golden eyes brimming with large tears.

The elevator doors opened and Angel was met with a unit from Wolfram and Hart's security. "Sir, we-"

Angel brushed past them, shooting them an acrimonious look. "Get out of my way!" He growled. "She needs a doctor."

* * *

A/N: I know that it was mean to hurt Harmony but it's all part of the storyline. It's all part of the curse punishment.

_ReganX _and_ Charmed-Angel4_, I know you guys were looking for a chicken pops infested chapter but I really couldn't do that to everyone and most people, even in the _Angel_ universe, get theirs when they're young. I just gave Wesley a severe case of an allergic reaction in return.

_Brigurl,_ the dress-up will be up soon. There was a reason this chappy came first_._

_Seatbelts, _Eve _might_ meet child Harmony but I don't consider Knox significant enough to be mentioned much more be in the company of little Harmony. Maybe I'm biased because he killed Fred. But you never know. I just might change my mind. You also mentioned Cordy and I'm trying to get her mentioned but I don't think bringing her back as an adult or a child might be a good iudea just yet. We'll see. By the way, what's _tsujing_?

_Darklight_, I kind of agree with you on Lorne being the parental figure. It would be cute but I think Gunn should have the role. Lorne will be the fashionably conscious uncle. He will have his moment in the spotlight very soon.

Also, thanks to _gidgetgirl, Cordyfan _and_ Katey_ for your reviews.

Please review!


	7. Team Spirit

A/N: Thanks for the reviews. No fighting or drama here. Just some strange old fun.

* * *

"So you're telling us that these lobster things have been nesting here for almost a week and you only _tried_ to extract them now?" Spike angrily demanded as he and Angel confronted Wolfram and Hart's security unit. Angel had given them quite a good _scolding _and now, Spike felt he needed to give them his version.

"Sir, as we explained to Mr. Angel _earlier_, we were handling the situation. Unfortunately, one escaped just as we were about to exterminate it." The team leader, Brass, explained unenthusiastically.

The blonde vampire shook his head in disgust as he paced in front of the men. "In other words, you're all a bunch of incompetent Nancy boys. A child was hurt."

"With all due respect, Ms. Kendall is not a child." Brass retorted coolly.

Angel stepped forward, looking sullen. "Harmony has been turned into a child, her state of mind is of a child's and until this curse is reversed, everyone in this building will respectfully treat her as one. Understood?" He venomously hissed.

Brass, not looking all too pleased, nodded. "Yes, sir."

"I say, as punishment, I get to eat all you blithering idiots. Drink you dry until there's nothing left." Spike grinned with delight as he rubbed his hands together. Behind him, Spike could sense Angel's annoyance as the other vampire heaved a sigh. "Now, who do I pick first? Any volunteers?"

None of the men moved but Spike could sense their rising worry on whether this was a bluff or not. Brass, unfazed, spoke up. "Sir, there's a new policy in the firm. You can't kill your employees or coworkers."

"Is that right?" Spike drawled. "I'm sure Angel here will make an exception this one time. What do you say, Peaches?"

Angel shot him an irritated look. "Spike." He warned.

"For old times sake. I'll even give you two of them as a thank you gesture." He grinned just as Fred joined them. "Come on, _Gramps_."

"Guys, Harmony's awake." She said softly.

Angel nodded. "You're all dismissed." He declared and the men dispersed immediately. "Spike, stop threatening to eat the employees. No matter how menacing you think you are, no one else does."

"Don't get your underwear in a twist, Mahatma." Spike replied with an eye roll. "I was yanking their chain though it would have been nice to get a taste of some fresh blood once in a while. This whole tall, dark and dreary routine is so…well, it suits you but no fun for rest of us. You and your bloody make-the-world-as-depressed-as-I-am policy is getting old. Don't you agree, Fred?"

Fred shrugged, chuckling uncertainly. "We've kept Harmony heavily sedated. The lacerations on her back and arm are already starting to heal. They weren't fatal to begin with anyway. Just bloody." She declared, evading the question.

"She's not in any pain, right?" Angel asked.

Fred shook her head. "We put enough painkillers for a bull."

"Good." Angel murmured as they entered Harmony's room. The tiny little blonde girl was laying face down on the bed, flanked by Wes on the left side and Gunn on the right. Lorne had visited earlier but was called away to a meeting with a client who was threatening to suicide or some act of violence involving a machete if she didn't get an _Oscar_ this year.

"Hey, little vamp." Spike greeted with a small smile.

"How are you feeling?" Angel asked as he stood next to Spike.

She smiled lazily, drowsy from all the sedative that was being pumped into her veins. "I have an owwie but it doesn't hurt because I'm big. I'm big and I'm five." Harmony said, rather proud of herself.

Spike chuckled. "That you are, Harm." He said.

"Can we all play dress-up now?" Harm asked as her eyelids began to droop but stubborn that she was, Harmony fought to stay awake.

"Sweetie, you have to rest." Fred gently said.

Harmony groaned, pouting in displeasure. "But-"

"No buts, baby girl. You have an _owwie_ and although you're a big girl, you need your rest." Gunn stated firmly, the word _owwie _sounding ridiculous coming from the strong, imposing looking man. Fred sent a smile his way and Wesley nodded.

"We'll play dress-up another time." Angel assured Harmony.

"And_ everybody_ will play? And it's going to be a special dress-up, right?"

Angel nodded. "Yes, it's going to be special and we'll all play." He echoed.

Harmony smiled, appeased. "And I can ask Lorney Tunes to help? He said he's _really_, really good with special stuff."

"Sure, anything. Wes, can I speak to you for a moment?" The other man nodded and walked over to him. Angel and Wesley stepped out of the room just as Harmony finally fell asleep. "Did you find anything?"

"About the curse?"

Angel shook his head. "No, about the demon that attacked us. Do you think Wolfram and Hart let it loose?"

"If you mean after you, then no. I think that it was after Harmony." Wesley replied solemnly.

"Why would they want her?"

"I don't mean that the senior partners intentionally let it loose to kill Harmony. It was merely a _twist of fate_." Wesley clarified quietly. "This is the curse taking effect. The wheels are turning, Angel, and everything and anything that comes in contact with Harmony has a possibility of killing her, either on purpose or by pure accident. Specifically, eating her alive."

Angel gritted his teeth. "Find a way to break the curse, Wes."

"I'm trying but I don't think there's a way. It's either Harmony gets eaten within the time span she was given or she survives past that and hopefully, reverts back to her former self."

Angel sighed, looking sullen. "Then we're going to make sure she'll last longer than the three weeks."

"I'll ask Gunn to contact the mage as well. Maybe we can ask him to undo his curse."

* * *

_Three Days Later_

"How come I'm Bugs Bunny? This thing itches." Angel groused as he scratched the bright blue costume he was currently forced to wear. "And it's hot in here."

"You don't have a body temperature, remember?" Gunn pointed out.

Angel glared at him. "Shut up, _Aladdin_. Harmony, how come Gunn gets to be a prince and I'm a bunny?"

"You have big ears. That's why, you poof." Spike drawled with a snicker.

"For the record, Aladdin is only a prince because he married Princess J." Gunn declared. "Okay, I didn't mean to make Aladdin sound like a gold-digger."

Angel huffed and self-consciously touched his bunny ears with his bunny paws. Fred giggled. "Blue looks nice on you, Angel. And you're a cute bunny."

Harmony, decked out with a complete mermaid tail, red hair and mini seashell bra, nodded enthusiastically. "Yup, Angel, you're super pretty and you're Little Princess the Second's boyfriend. You didn't drink your carrot tea. Little Princess drank hers." She pointed out.

Harmony had obviously recovered well from her injuries and was fine now, except she still refused to use the elevator.

"There's no such thing as carrot tea." The vampire mumbled sullenly as he awkwardly picked up his miniature tea cup and took a sip.

Lorne scoffed. "Don't complain, Angel face. I'm _Mulan_." He said, smoothing his hands over his kimono. "I would have happily been Harry Potter but _someone_ took it!" He shot an acrimonious glare at Wesley who was primly sitting in his spot, looking at his Nimbus 2000.

Dressed in a very accurate Hogwarts uniform, Wesley looked up and shrugged at Lorne. "You wouldn't have been able pull off the accent, Lorne." He replied as he readjusted his new eyeglasses. "Besides, you're the one who ordered the costumes. You should have picked first but you _didn't_."

"Yes." Angel agreed, continuing to drink his tea. "I blame you too. It was your idea to go over the top with a simple dress-up game. A feather boa, a pink or purple dress and some make up would have done the trick."

At the mention of make-up, Wesley looked horrified. "I am perfectly satisfied being Harry Potter in this game. I wonder if a simple spell could make this broom fly."

Harmony looked at Wes quizically. She still couldn't understand who Harry Potter was although Gunn, who was surprisingly knowledgeable about the topic, had explained it to her.

"You're the one who promised her that we'll all play, Captain Forehead. I say, _you're_ to blame." Spike stated.

"Ooh, wow, guys. The aggression in this room is making me queasy and this Sea Breeze taste bad. Maybe we should have waited until Halloween to do this, my chickadees." Lorne said with a sigh. "I mean, we are a few months ahead. But I have to say, this kimono sure is airy." He declared, picking up his drink.

Fred shook her head. "We don't have that much time, remember?" She gave them a meaningful look. Everyone looked down sheepishly. "Now, it's only a day and Lorne and Harmony-I mean _Mulan_ and _Ariel_ worked hard on this. Let's just play."

"Queen Amidala here is right." Spike spoke up. "So, what's next on the menu, pet?" He asked turning to Harmony.

Harmony beamed, flipping her fishtail excitedly. "Legolas has to hunt Bugs Bunny now like Elmer. Aladdin has to save Bugs. Queen Amidala and Harry have to fight because…because they don't like each other but they secretly do."

Spike grinned as he examined his weapon. "I'm going to enjoy this. Hop away now, Peaches." He taunted Angel. "Just as a fair warning, I am going to hurt you." He chuckled.

"How come_ I_ get hunted?" Angel demanded.

"Isn't Harry a little young for Queen Amidala?" Gunn asked.

Fred sighed. "Play along, guys."

"And I'm left out." Lorne mumbled as he took a sip of his drink. "Give me a wedgy now to add to my humiliation."

"You can help me blow bubbles and we can sing." Harmony suggested as she scooted next to Lorne, unable to walk because of the mermaid tail.

Angel, who still refused to be hunted by Spike, spoke up. "Sing? I'll sing."

"No!" Everyone in the room exclaimed in unison.

The door burst open and Eve stood by the doorway, a stunned expression on her face. Her crimson lips stretched into an evil grin as she took a good look at the group, who were currently either frozen in their spot of fidgeting from discomfort. "Well-."

Angel, looking rather absurd in his costume, stepped forward. "You _never_ saw this, Eve."

* * *

A/N: I know that the dress-up was unconventional but sitting around all dressed up and drinking tea was already done with Wes. It had to go this way.

Please review!


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